never say never
by NaleyWriter23
Summary: Inspired by the OTH Con... what happens when Joy sees James again for the first time? [JLs Story]
**Anyone who knows me, knows I'm obsessed with James and Joy. I haven't written in forever but I was recently inspired by the con sooo here's my latest JLs centered one shot. (Obviously it's not real, wish it was, but it's pure imagination and what I want to happen)**

 **It's written in Joy's perspective, enjoy!**

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"Oh God," was along the lines of my first thought when I saw him again. I had known he'd be there, I just- well, I guess I was caught off guard or something. My lips parted as if commanded by some primal instinct and I swore I could feel my heart lurch into the pit of my stomach. He was always attractive, but I don't think I've ever seen him look this good. What's that saying? Like fine wine, he gets better with age? Because it's true. James Lafferty somehow, impossibly gets better looking with age. It didn't make sense, but I was practically drooling at the way his plaid shirt clung to his tight, muscular body. No wonder why there were so many girls screaming in line for him. Hell, I'd be screaming in line for him.

I shook my head, dazed by my sudden and bizarre feelings. I've known him for what, nearly fifteen years, and now I start acting like a giddy, hormonal teenager? It just didn't make sense. Like I said, I've always known he was an attractive guy, but never had my heart practically oozed in his presence. Seriously, I think I started sweating. Then again, I was sick. That had to be it. I was sick, and I was feeling faint. I needed water. It was stifling in there. Really. Who puts the heat on in seventy degree weather? That's definitely why I was sweating.

Yet, one look into his clear blue eyes and I forgot the English language. I couldn't speak. I literally had no voice. But I was sick, so it's not like I couldn't talk because he was standing two feet in front of me smelling absolutely Godly-right? Oh man, I've been single for far too long.

We barely had time to say a proper hello because next thing I knew, the fans were being called to take their photo with us for the Naley Duo. It never fails to amaze me how much support we get from our fans, and I'll forever be grateful. I love meeting them, listening to how much they adore our characters- I can't help but swell with hubris; an excessive pride.

Secretly, I love watching James interact with them. Practically every girl shakes with nerves, gasping joyfully when he puts his arms around them. I almost laugh because he tooks so nervous, like he doesn't want to make them uncomfortable. He's revealed to me that he sometimes feels awkward when thousands of girls want to randomly hug him, but he too, is so appreciative of their lifelong support because we definitely wouldn't be where we are today if it weren't for them.

One girl refused to untangle herself from his embrace and I felt sick again. My stomach hardened like steel, soon melting as it boiled with...jealousy? No. That's ridiculous. I probably had to puke from the medicine or something. Why the hell would I be jealous of some thirteen-year-old having her arms all over James? Seriously, that's just...weird. I must've made a weird face or something because James discreetly mouthed to me, asking if I was feeling okay. There went that gooey feeling in my heart again. He's such a caring, sweet guy. Whomever marries him will be one lucky bitch. Wait, what the hell am I saying?

I smiled at him, replying that I was fine-obviously lying, and praying he wouldn't pick up on it. James knew me so well, it was scary. I guess that happens when you work so closely with someone for so long. I miss him, oh, how I've missed him so much.

Luckily, he didn't have time to further analyze me because another fan stepped up, posing for the picture. I felt James' hand touch my shoulder, igniting a fire on my skin. It was burning up in there. Someone should've opened a freakin' window or something. It was getting harder to breathe...stupid congestion.

The fan smiled, thanking us before walking away, and James suddenly pulled me into his arms causing a gasp to emit from my dry throat.

"We didn't really get to say hello," he grinned. "I've missed you, Joy."

"I-I missed you too." I mumbled with my arms still wound around his muscular torso. Lord, he is the most fit guy I have ever known. In that moment I understood why the fan wouldn't let go of him-I didn't want to, either. How did I ever let go of him?

I've found myself wondering about it-him...us- a lot lately and I don't know why. It's like a little person inside of my brain, silently nudging these emotions to arise. I think about what could have been. What could still be.

A fan interrupted my thoughts, starting a conversation, but I couldn't really talk and I felt bad.

"I'm sorry, I feel like crap. I must look like crap, too." I muttered.

"Oh, Joy! You're absolutely gorgeous! I wish I could look like you." The young girl gushed, making me smile.

"I agree." James grinned.

My eyebrow shot up tantalizingly, "You think I'm pretty?" My voice was teasing, but inwardly I was again, melting into my skin.

"Oh, absolutely!" He said in an airy tone, but his smile was sincere.

Oh God, I thought again.

For most of the show, I was married and James was off dating random women, so we never had a chance to be a real couple. Now though, I'm single, and James… well, I'm not too sure what he is right now, but- no, no. I have to stop thinking these thoughts. It would never happen. James doesn't see me like that. I'm not his type. I'm just his nerdy, quirky co-worker who he happened to make out with for nine years straight.

People often ask me how feelings never developed between us and I don't really know how to respond. I mean, maybe there were always underlying feelings and perhaps we just never realized them nor have we ever acted upon them. The point is, I've been thinking that maybe, just maybe, if there are some left over feelings, or whatever, maybe we should explore them.

I'm crazy, but we have chemistry. He's sexy, I'll admit it. He's funny, and kind, and caring, and- well, you get the point.

Maybe what I've been searching my whole life for has been right in front of me all along.

My thoughts came to a screeching halt when James pulled away from the hug and greeted the next fan. I once again suppressed my peculiar thoughts and continued to smile for the camera, desperately trying to fight the feelings for my former co-worker.

The rest of the day went by so quickly, I can barely remember what even happened. It was so much to process, but still an amazing time, nonetheless. The only other time I saw James was during our question and answer panel.

I was a freakin' nervous wreck the entire time, but simultaneously, it was the happiest I have been in a while. James is quiet and reserved, but he sure knows how to make me laugh. Together we reminisced on our memories, discussing the good times and answering questions. I felt young again. I felt alive.

Whenever I answered a question, I could feel his warm blue eyes focus on my body and I fought the urge to just get up and kiss him right there.

I was stunned by that thought. Kiss him? God, we haven't done that since the last episode… in the rain, of course.

When he'd answer a question, I too, would look at him and become entranced by the sexiness of his voice. He told the story of how we first met. I hadn't remembered but he did, and once again, my heart stopped. I can't believe he remembered that!

All I knew was that he was a young, handsome kid. So nice, very professional. I never minded working with him. In fact, I loved working with him. I'd work with him again.

James is still an amazing guy. Someone asked how we had such great chemistry and I couldn't stop my loud mouth from screaming, "we're both just so sexy!"

A blush immediately crept upon my cheeks, but luckily no one noticed.

Listen, I'm not blind, okay? Everyone with eyes can tell you James is hot. There's no denying it. I'm not going to lie!

In all seriousness, I loved the panel. I loved talking with James about the show. We played such an epic romance, and it's nice to truly appreciate it. I also revealed that everytime I hear "always and forever," his handsome face immediately pops into my mind.

My ex once jokingly said it to me and it felt wrong. I felt wrong. Then of course, James said he can't ever say "Don't say I never gave you anything" because it reminded him of us. We have such a deep connection, and no one but us would ever understand it. It's hard to explain, actually. Our camaraderie is just...there. Always has been, always will be. James gets me. I get him. We have a unique bond, and while we may not outwardly show it, we feel it inwardly.

I feel him in my soul. Perhaps we are soulmates; we don't need to be in a relationship for that to happen. I truly believe soulmates can be anyone, meaning not necessarily a significant other.

James is my soulmate. There. I said it.

I love him. I might not (yet) be in love with him, but hey, it could happen. For so long, I told everyone-including myself-that James and I would never be in a relationship. But never say never.

Through the past year, I've opened myself up to that idea. The show is over and I'm single. What do we have to lose?

There's just one problem; how am I supposed to tell him? For all I know, he could not be interested in me or the idea of dating me. When we were younger, I always had a feeling he might be into me, but being the gentleman he is, he never did anything about it. Of course the timing has always sucked for us, but maybe now is the time. We're not getting any younger. Screw it. I'm going to tell him. Tell him what exactly?

'Hey James, I think you're hot. We should go out and hook up, you know, to see if there are any feelings between us?' Yeah. No.

Ugh. Why does this have to be so damn difficult?

Once again, I'm pulled from my thoughts when a fan gives us fortune cookies. We have to add the phrase 'in bed' at the end of it. Okay, I thought, this could be fun.

Of course mine is "You'll be rewarded for all your hard work this month, in bed." Ha. The stupid blush came back when James playfully nudged my shoulder.

"Wow, that's really specific," he said, chuckling.

My mind deceives me as images of a very naked James on top of me in bed, flicker endlessly. Shit.

I bit my lip and turned toward him as he opens his. "Your lucky color this week is green, in bed."

We laugh loudly, and I think of a green bra and pantie set I own. I wonder if he'd like that- oh no. Stop.

"Well it is St. Patrick's Day soon." He smirked causing the girls to scream shrilly. I'd scream too if I could.

Then I remember how many times we've kissed and I began to long for it… for his lips against mine. I took advantage of it for so long, thinking solely of it as work. Any girl would die to kiss him, and I was lucky enough to kiss him for nine years as a LIVING. Luck doesn't get any better than that. Too bad the luck ran out and I took advantage of it.

Suddenly, I'm overcome with inspiration for a song. Someone asked me about my music and I felt the urge to write about James. About taking chances, about shitty timing, and resurfacing feelings. I started singing, or humming, without realizing-I do that a lot-and James looked at me with nothing but pure admiration. I swear I nearly fell off my chair.

"You have a beautiful voice." He said.

Another damn blush. "Oh, thanks." I smiled, and he continued to stare at me, getting lost in each other's silent eyes.

Fans asked more questions, and as we were listening, someone in the back row shouted "You guys should be together!"

Suddenly, my hands became far too interesting as I looked at them, fiddling with the ring on my pinky.

We remained silent, but I wondered what James was thinking. Was he repulsed by the idea? Perhaps he was hopeful, inwardly agreeing with the fan?

This was nothing new… fans are always asking if we're together, or telling us we should be. Usually we'd laugh it off, not wanting to break their optimistic hearts.

I don't know where it all changed. I can't point to a specific moment, but I started thinking maybe our fans were right-maybe we should be together.

The panel ended, and I decided I needed a nap, or something. I needed to stop thinking about James. I had to get away from him, so I headed back to my hotel room for about an hour seeing as I had a lull in the schedule.

Throwing myself onto the queen size bed, my mind ceased to stop thinking about James. I let out a frustrated groan and grabbed my phone. I needed to talk to someone who'd give me advice and I knew the perfect person.

"Joy?" He answered immediately and I smiled.

"Paul! Hi. I need to talk to you." Paul Johanson and I have an interesting friendship, but I don't know what I'd do without him. He has supported James and I from day one and I truly value his opinion.

"Well, what's going on? Isn't the con this weekend?"

I bit my lip, falling against the pillows, "Yeah, I'm at the con."

"Are you alright?"

"Yes. No. Agh, I don't know!" I groaned.

"What 's wrong?"

I could hear ruffling of paper on the other end of the line with people talking in the background. Seconds later, the noise had gone silent and all I heard was Paul's heavy breathing.

"I...I think I have a crush on James."

Paul laughed, "James Lafferty?"

"Yes." I whispered, afraid to confirm it. "I, God...Paul, I don't even know what's happening to me. It's like today my eyes opened and I realized how freakin' attractive he is! I can't stop smiling when he's around me. My heart actually aches, and I just- I want to kiss him!"

The line was silent for a moment, and I thought he had hung up.

"Are you still there?" I asked nervously.

"Yea, I'm still here." Paul said. "I just can't believe it."

"What do you mean?"

"Actually, I can believe it. It was bound to happen eventually… I'm just surprised it happened this late. Look, Joy, you and James played a couple for what, nine years? Of course there are going to be feelings or something. James told me the same thing-"

I think my heart stopped. "What? When?"

"I don't know. It was years ago. He came to my trailer one night, freaking out about having feelings for you or something. It might have been season four or five. I can't remember. Anyway, he was worried because you were married and he couldn't do anything about it. He didn't want to freak you out and he wanted advice about how to make the feelings go away."

My eyes refused to blink. I was staring at the pastel yellow wall in complete and utter shock. James liked me.

"I...Jeeze, I can't believe this!"

Paul scoffed sarcastically, "Are you really in shock? Joy, it was so painfully obvious. That poor boy was head over heels. It nearly killed him when you got married. He felt so awkward because he thought you knew."

This had to be some kind of messed up dream… it couldn't be true. "No, I had no freakin' clue!"

"Don't freak out. Feelings are bound to form, you just realized them a little later."

"What the hell should I do?"

"Honestly?"

"Yeah, honestly."

I heard Paul inhale deeply, "Tell him how you feel. The timing has always sucked between you two. Maybe eve after all these years, now is your chance. Trust me, don't run from this. You'll regret it."

I breathed shakily, trying to find the courage in my body. "Yeah, okay, yeah. You're right Paul. I'm gonna tell him."

"Seriously?" I heard his voice take on a happier tone. "It's about damn time! I've been secretly pulling for you two forever."

A smile pulled forcefully at my lips, "Yeah, seriously."

"Well good for you Joy. I'm happy for you. Good luck, and let me know how it goes."

"Okay, I will. Thanks again, Paul."

Before he could answer, I hung up and sprung out of the bed, dashing to the mirror and making sure I look good. I didn't know how I was going to broach the topic, but I was going to tell James how I feel, letting him decide what we should do or where we'd go next.

I found him alone in the lounge behind the stage. No one was there, and I knew that was the perfect time.

"Hey, I was looking for you. Where'd you run off to?" He asked me, looking up from his cellphone.

Slowly, I made my way over to him and took a seat on the leather couch right beside his deliciously scented body. "Oh, I was in my hotel room."

"You must be exhausted. I think it's so great that you came even though you're sick." He smiled warmly and my stomach exploded with a swarm of giant butterflies.

"I'd do anything for these fans." I said, nestling into his body like a kneejerk reaction.

James comfortably threw his arm around my shoulder and smiled, "I know. Me too. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by this… in a good way though. It's nice to see the show had such an impact."

"Yeah, it's great. Plus, I'm sure you like to get your ego stroked from time to time about how hot you are."

James chuckled, "That's definitely a plus."

"So…" I sat up suddenly and smiled mischievously. "I had an idea."

"Well that can't be good." He smirked.

"Shut up!" I laughed, slapping him playfully.

"Okay, what's your idea?"

"A million people have asked me to take a selfie with you. Wanna help me kill everyone and take a picture of us?" I asked with a giddy smile. "I'm gonna post it on Instagram."

James threw his head back, laughing. "You're evil, but I like the way you think. Let's do it!"

I cuddled into his side, enjoying the way I fit so perfectly in his arms. I held my phone out in front of us and we smiled as I snapped a few photos.

"Let me pick which one." He said, grabbing my phone and scrolling through it. "Okay, this one." He leaned down and flashed me the photo on the screen. Holy shit, he looked good.

"I love it," I smiled. "Thanks." I didn't want to get up from our position. It was so comfortable and just felt right. I wanted to lean over and run my hands all over his chest, kissing those perfect lips-but I had to talk to him first.

A calming silence settled among us and my head nestled comfortably on his chest.

"James?" I finally said, taking a deep breath and looking into his crystal blue eyes.

Those blue eyes crashed visually with my brown eyes, glistening with encouragement. "Yeah?"

"Um, I...do you ever think about-did you-ugh." I sighed in frustration, clearly unable to formulate a coherent sentence.

"What is it, Joy?"

"Look, I was just wondering… I don't' know. It's stupid."

James placed his hand on top of mine, "Hey, come on. It's me. You can tell me anything, Joy."

I licked my lips, looking longingly into his eyes, "Okay, I'm just gonna say it. Did you ever think of us being in a relationship?"

James' eyebrows rose high on his forehead, clearly surprised by the direction of the conversation. "Oh, uh-"

"You don't have to answer-"

"No, no, it's not that, I just wasn't expecting that question." He looked away shyly, becoming interested in the laces on his sneakers. "But um, I won't lie. The thought of us crossed my mind a few times."

"It did?" I asked in a quiet tone, yet hope was evident in my voice.

He nodded and I sat up.

"Obviously I wasn't naive enough to think we'd ever be together-"

"Why not?"

James' eyes strayed from mine, "You were married, and I was always younger than you. As much as I wanted you, I never let my hopes get up because I just accepted it'd never happen." He shrugged.

I inhaled sharply, "Well what about now?"

James became rigid, "Wh-what do you mean?"

Twisting my body, I half straddled his waist, giving him a smirk. "I'm not married anymore, and it happens to be that I like younger guys."

A blush crept upon his cheek, "Um, Joy, I…"

"James! Joy! How are you guys?"

At the sound of a voice, I immediately climbed off of him and flattened out the wrinkles in my shirt. It's not like we were doing anything (I wish), but I felt like I was caught for doing something naughty.

It was Antwon. He must've seen the look on my face and gave James a nod. "Oh, y'all, damn. I didn't mean to interrupt. Yous just continue whatever you were doing-it's about damn time man!"

James coughed, "Oh no, dude, it's not, we weren't…"

Before he could finish explaining, Antwon left.

Once again, our eyes collided and I wanted to kiss him. I was so tempted. His lips were so close, I couldn't help but stare.

"James, I know it's late but maybe-"

He frowned, and I stopped talking.

"Why does the timing always suck between us?"

"What?" I asked, confused.

He dropped my hand, "I guess you don't know…"

"Don't know what?"

"I'm with someone."

Well, shit.

Science can explain practically every feeling but I don't think it can explain the pain I felt in my heart at that moment. It's like it began to teeter from an exploding valve.

"Oh." Was all that was able to breathe from my lips.

I felt stupid. How did I not know this?

"Joy, I'm sorry. If this conversation happened a year ago, I wouldn't think twice. But as always, the timing sucks."

"It's okay, really. I'm sorry, I'm so stupid-" I shook my head, completely mortified.

"No you're not. You didn't know." James hugged my shoulders.

"So, who's the lucky girl?"

A goofy grin spread over his lips, and my heart pulsed again. "Alexandra Park. She's an actress in The Royals."

Ah yes, typical actress. I knew of her, and she was James' type: skinny, blue eyes, long brown hair… basically a model. Tears pricked my eyes but I continued to smile. "Well good for you. I'm happy for you, James. You deserve to be happy."

"Thanks, Joy. So do you."

Together we got up from the couch and he held me in his arms. "You'll always be my number one. Always and forever, right?"

I laughed into his shoulder, feeling my stomach flip.

"I wish the timing was different-"

"No, no." I stopped him, "Don't worry about it. It was just a thought I had. You're pretty sexy, Lafferty."

James chuckled, "I know."

"What am I going to do with you?" I giggled.

"How about you come and meet Alex tonight? Please? Your opinion means everything to me, Joy."

I chewed on my lip, contemplating the poisonous idea. I didn't want to but one look at his cute smile and I couldn't say no.

Even if James and I were constantly the ones who got away from each other, I'll forever be grateful that he is in my life.

"I'd love to meet her." I smiled, "She better be good enough for you," I joked, narrowing my eyes.

"She is, but I'll let you be the judge of that." He smirked, playfully squeezing my side. "And next guy that's lucky enough to date you better pass my test."

I rolled my eyes, "Alright, deal."

Maybe we're not meant to be together, and it may take time for me to be okay with that, but I am confident James will always be in my life.

Yet, who knows... maybe in ten or fifteen years, fate will finally be on our side and we can be together. Never say never.

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 **Sorry the ending sucks, I just was impatient and wanted to post it. Maybe depending on the reviews I'll add another chapter.**

 **Anyway, thanks so much for reading!**


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